My name is Squish!

Oh, hey!! I’m Squish! It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m the cutest little boy, estimated to be around 11 months old and I’m officially up for adoption!

Want to know what’s weird?? Me! Yep, you read that right. I. Am. Freaking. Weird. How weird am I, you ask? Let me count the ways.

1. I look super weird. But if weird means...I may be the cutest little mix on the planet...then...I’m weird. People have said French Bulldog/Pit mix, some have said Boston Terrier/Boxer mix but those are just guesses. Joke’s on those people. I’m a chihuahua. I kid...I kid.

2. I am a tiny bundle of awkward (only 37lbs for all you tiny home dwellers). Do you watch shows about tiny homes? I can help you design a home for all things tiny, like myself. My decorating advice: adopt Squish. Feed Squish two times a day from a tiny bowl. I’ve just given you very solid decorating advice, for free! You’re welcome.

3. I run weird. My running is this odd display of moving in a forward motion, while doing play bows. My front paws are often much farther ahead of me than you’d think they should be. I’m basically this floppy, happy, derp of a dog. Please don’t take out a recording device when I do this on laminate flooring. It will be embarrassing for us all. It’s important that you keep your dignity if you adopt me. I have none.

4. I rarely take things seriously but if you don’t know me, I can appear pretty darn serious! I have this thing that rescue humans call a “hard bark” which sounds kinda scary but it turns out, I do it when I’m scared, confused, want attention, want to play...you get the gist. It’s all the time. That’s just my bark. My foster mom says I need to “cool my jets” with that kind of bark in this tiny body because I look all sorts of crazy.

5. I really like other dogs but my play style is again...yep...you guessed it...weird/awkward. First, I’m probably going to hard bark but I’m just so happy, I can’t contain it! Then, it’s play time! But I like to go for their legs and feet which I’m told isn’t the best way to make friends. I have some pretty tolerant teachers in my foster home though, so we do bits of playing and when I start to go for the legs and feet, my foster mom says it’s time to relax before the other dogs don’t want to play with me anymore.

6. I’m a mix of sweet and sour. I absolutely LOVE people and I’m the sweetest boy who gives all the kisses and wants to snuggle up and cuddle. But sometimes, all this sweetness puts me into a frenzy and I start to get mouthy and grab clothes. My foster mom says that’s not appropriate though so when she sees I’m so happy I’m about to go into a “Squish Frenzy” she stops giving me attention and she gets very relaxed and zen. That’s weird! Have you met my foster mom? She’s not zen! I don’t know who she thinks she’s kidding. But it does work. I calm down and when I’m back to being relaxed and sweet, (not sour) I get the affection back that I love so much. Besides just being “zen” when I get hyped, I redirect very nicely with a toy so I can stop thinking clothes are toys. I’ve already improved tremendously with consistency though.

7. I’m such a good boy in my crate. Like, basically the bestest crated boy there ever was! I’m nice and quiet and I lay right down and sleep through the night without one peep. We’ll remove this from the “weird” column and just put it in the “bestest boy ever” column.

8. I’m potty trained but I’m little and I don’t have a lot of hair so I’m cold out there. I may run back to the door in a shivery panic, but if I didn’t do my business before I came in, an accident could be had in the house. This is Illinois, who chooses to live in this weather??!! It’s not my fault I’m here, stuck in this frozen tundra so please don’t be upset if I have an accident.

9. My foster mom calls me a “creeper”. I don’t know what that means but she usually calls me it when she’s in the shower. I really love her so I sit right outside that glass door and watch her. I also very delicately stand my front paws up on the glass shower door and smash my face against the glass so I can protect her from the shower better. I guess the word “creeper” means I’m a super duper guard dog. Subtract another weird point!

10. I’m basically terrified of cars. My freedom ride was less of what one would call a freedom ride and more of a patience test for humans. My foster mom wanted to make it a very positive experience so she took her time. And her time. And her time. And the sun was setting, almost all the employees at animal control had left and there we were. Just looking at each other, outside of that car. There was one brave employee who climbed in the back of my foster mom’s dirty car and in the end, my foster mom grabbed my behind and hoisted me in that car while the nice helper took my leash. Mission accomplished. My foster mom said we’re going to start working on this by doing short rides to go for ice cream cones.

11. I’m a hair stylist. When my foster mom tries to nap, I kiss her face and then I like to eat the tiny flyaway strands of hair on her head. I’m so gentle when I do it but clearly this woman needs help in the hair department. There’s no excuse for flyaways. Get yourself a Squish and you’ll never again have a bad hair day. My foster mom doesn’t always appreciate my skills, she often says her hair smells like dog breath. Rude.

12. I also really like my tail. My tail and I have the mostest fun that tails and dogs could have. We do lots of chasing and my tail even helps me floss my teeth (see video example).

To sum it up for you, I’m weirdly awesome. I also live with 3 kids and I like them, they’re weird.

I’m neutered, vaccinated, microchipped and heartworm negative. To meet me, please fill out an application at animalheartline.org. Stay weird, folks!

Squish is terrified of the car so we will be limiting his adoptions to a 50 mile radius